Excited, Happy, Nervous, Antsy, Anxious, etc.

Okay, I will start at the beginning. Today, before school even started me, Brendon, Aubri, Sam, Chase, and Connor were sitting in Chase’s garage and Sam and Aubri were talking about relationships and Sam said “I have a boyfriend”, Aubri said “I don’t and I don’t care”, so I said “I’m still waiting for me and Nathan to get there”. That’s when Aubri goes “He’ll ask, just wait. I’ll drop a hint. HaHa”. Well, me and Nathan always meet before 3rd hour starts and today he was especially anxious and determined to get me to ride with him after school. I didn’t know why, cos I saidI would get a ride home with him everyday after school. So, I just let it be. Well, come lunch time, I head over to Kayliegh’s and Chase’s. Kayliegh was doing something on her stairs, so I grabbed my cigarettes. I looked at her and told her about Nathan before 3rd hour. And that’s when she said “Well, I heard through the grape vine that he’s planning on asking you out today”. I just stood there in schock(but in a good way). And I kept saying “where did you hear that from? where? it was aubri wasn’t it?” After I said Aubri, she told me yes. So, I got in his car afterschool, and while we were driving to my house, I was just waiting for it. I wasn’t going to say anything, incase if he wasn’t going to ask me, I didn’t want to make an ass of myself. So, I just waited and we just talked about random things. Well, we pull into my driveway and as I’m getting out, he says to me “Well, before you get out, there’s something I want to ask you. I have been holding back on this for quite some time because I don’t know what to say; Would you want to go do something sometime? Like, a movie or whatever?”. At this point, I was jumping around dancing, but only on the inside. I said yes. He looked happy and relieved. But the thing is, if it were going to be this weekend, I would have to skip out on going to my dad’s. Which, don’t get me wrong, it’s totally worth. Because I mean, I really like this guy ALOT, and I have been waiting for him to ask me on a date for about a month and a half now, and come on, I have NEVER been asked out on a real date before. It’s always been “will you be my girlfriend?”, then the “dates” follow. I mean, that’s nice, but I have wanted to be asked out on a date for quite some time, especially since its with a guy I really like. HaHa. So, Long story short, I am super happy right now. I’m very excited, and nervous at the same time. But, that’s really all for now. pce.

 

                                                               -Samm d’Massacre

A great guy, a ride home, and possible mono!

Well, today I missed school. I was coughing crap up(and non-stop) and my throat was very sore, it still is to a small degree. So, around 11am, I went to the school with my aunt, I went around to all my teachers and got my assignments. At least I’m on top of things this year. I just finished everything I had to do for my classes, and I started at around 3pm, it is now 8:30pm. I hope that gives you an idea of how much work I had. Yet again, I have 2 math classes this trimester. Those math teachers LOVE piling on the work man, I tell you what. But, yesterday was definitely better than today, and tomorrow will be too. Nathan gave me a ride home yesterday. I really like him. And I like how he offered me a ride wthout me even talking about it. I never even thought about it, and then he asked “How do you get home from school?”. I still didn’t know where that conversation was going at first. I told him I walked or rode the bus. Then out of nowhere, he asked me if I wanted a ride home from him. I was shocked, but in a good way. The ride was fun while it lasted(I live about 2 minutes away from the school), and after he dropped me off, while I was getting out of the car, he said “You know, this can be an everyday thing if you want”. SCORE! HaHa. I say score because I really like him and I never get to see him during the day really, and I don’t have to ride the obnoxious bus.

(Sep. 11, 2008)- Didn’t go to school today either. Mom says I might have mono. NO! I don’t want mono. So, tomorrow I have to go in and get tested for it, which involves one of the things I hate most on this planet…. Blood Test. My veins bruise like crazy! And it hurts. I will have to deal with it though. Luckily I am still keeping up on getting my assignments. But, I better go. I’m so tired and I cannot stop coughing. Bye.

 

~Hope I get well!
-Samm d’Massacre

From confusion to hope.

*Sigh*    Well, Nathan and I are talking again. That’s an awesome thing. I really like him, and I hope that in the future something could come of this. But, the real happiness came when I checked my myspace. It said “new comment approvals”. Meaning, there were comments I needed to approve. He left me a regular profile comment and a photo comment. The regualr comment was that he missed me this morning, or didn’t see me(we were supposed to meet this morning in the cafeteria, I went in and didn’t see him) and then he saw me going into class, and that he will definitely make conversation next time we see each other. Then the photo comment made me light up. He commented on a picture of me from April 2007, I was going to my ex’s prom. He said “Looking good Samm… Thought it had to be said!”. It might be weird that it makes me happy, but its the little things that make me smile. But, I don’t want to make it a big deal, in cae things don’t progress or go anywhere. It’s just, he’s sweet, he’s funny, he’s smart, he’s polite, he’s respectful, he’s very attractive, he shares alot of the same interests as me, he’s just one of those guys I hope something happens with. So, while I had given up, and I felt hopeless, things came back into the light. School’s going good, Nathan is back to talking with me, I am becoming more social, etc.

                            I hope things get better.

                                                                                 -Samm d’Massacre